Friday, March 26, 2010

Hands are FULL!

I have decided I don't understand how little boys ALL!!

Growing up with one brother I understood only the variety that my brother was.  But RAISING a little boy has introduced me to a TOTALLY different world.  As I type a giant green truck is racing around me and loud "BEEP BEEP"s are echoing in my ears.

Some of the choice reasons I am struggling this week with understanding little boys and their thoughts?
Where to begin?

I go into said little boy's room to find clothes on the floor were wet.  We had to leave right then for the doctor's office, but I managed to insert a little confrontation "Why are these clothes wet?" "I dont know" ..I pause to smell the evidence.  "Did you go potty on these clothes?"  And darn it, the answer was YES and we HAD to leave right then to go to the doctor's office.  In his defense I don't think it was done with malintent.  I think he was shivering without any clothes trying to decide what to wear...and the cold air just got to him.

I found our new kitchen cabinets had been indented in a massive big line down the drawer with a toy.  Thank you, my son!

Brian found a toy bin, WITH toys, that had a very unpleasant odor, and um...liquid.  Yes - the toys had been urinated on.  Brian carried the bin upstairs and outside.  After a 1 1/2 HOUR long time out (I know that may seem alarmingly long to most parents, but since we had confronted this issue months ago and it was needed) we had ds go outside with a big bucket of soapy water and clean every toy and scrub it, and the bin.  He was out there 30 minutes.  I don't think *knock on wood* we will be dealing with that one again.  But if we do - he knows what he'll have to do!

There is always the milder things - like waking up his baby sister when his friends come over, and pusing sister down occasionally, and opening every tube of toothpaste we own (thanks to couponing, thats a LOT) and using every single one, getting into mom and dad's protein bars, opening up 10 and eating just bites of each one, and dropping them in toy bins - yeah there is stuff like that too.  *SIGH* - I don't know how you moms with multiple boys do it! This one keeps me on my toes!!

Friday, March 05, 2010

Brian's Jack Bauer moment

You would think that life as a high school anatomy teacher and boys bowling coach would render itself to a certain safety zone.  However, things can happen when you least expect them to...

Brian was downstate in O'Fallon Illinois at Boy Bowling STATE - yes they made it this year.  The boys and most of the parents drove down very excitedly at what could be a highlight in (many of them) their senior year.  At the hotel after the big day of the tournament - a full day of game after game after game...the unthinkable happened.

One of the fathers saw a drunk driver ram into their car in the hotel parking lot.  He had been inside with Brian and some of the other parents.  He ran outside to confront a man who was poised for a nice HIT AND RUN affair.  The father came toward the vehicle, and just as the drunk driver was in the process of turning the car to drive off, the father stuck his hand through the window and somehow grabbed the keys. 

Well, This guy was getting very riled up in his intoxicated state and tried to POUNCE on the father with a fury.  With curse works flying in this agitated state, Brian and two of the fathers pinned him up against the nearby hotel exterior wall.  Brian saw a huge knife in his jacket, and grabbed the knife from the man before it could be used against them. After they had the knife and the keys he got out of their grip, and then said to the father,

"Do you have good health insurance?"

The father looked up to see another knife he had extracted from his person, and had it hoisted above his head - ready to throw it right at the father's heart.

Luckily, the police had been called and just as the knife was about to be thrown, the policeman grabbed the knife from the man.

Brian explained what had happened with the two knives and how it was an attempted assault.  (He was actually holding the knife in his hand when the policeman drove up, which could have looked bad had there not been other witnesses)  The policeman, instead of pursuing that (even though he was now holding the drunk driver's knives in his possession) he began to perform a drunk driving test on him, having him take steps and what not. 

Brian and the other dads were incredulous that he wasn't being charged with attempted assault.  They watched for a moment, and the drunk driver looked up during his "test" to see the father was looking. He said roughly, "What are you looking at" and then DOVE at the father in the MIDDLE of the test. 

Finally, it was at THAT moment, that a 2nd and 3rd set of policeman immediately put him in one of the cars and handcuffed him.  The bowling boys, meanwhile, getting everything on camera from the balcony above on their cell phones.  This turned out to come in handy as the questioning of witnesses commenced.

So, in the words of Brian's principal - who is a huge black dude - "SO - YOU ARE A HERO."  And so he was!!